etc. on love:

Love is not a feeling I'm completely
comfortable with
yet
I may not get the chance for the
feeling to sink into my jaded, aging
skin
We are too young
Fact
We are in love
Debatable, as there is no
comparable or universal definition of the term
And this stream of consciousness is completely one sided
We care about the state of each other's hearts, even though we both are aware that the heart is not the seat of emotion
That much I am comfortable stating
But there is not much else I can say with impunity
Should I let myself love someone who may never forgive my errors of inexperience?
Should I let anyone love me, when the probability is that I will hurt them and leave them wanting?
Let anyone love me
I have no control over that save running and blatant sabotage


To love
Is to obtain total relaxation with my partner,
And surrender a portion of my heart with which they may do as they wish.
Is there heart left for me to give away while maintaining a strong enough beat to sustain me alone?
I cannot give too much
I do not want to be left stranded on the side of the road when I prove myself to be a faulty model
with holes in her software.


But this
This is all fear
And there can be no love where fear
makes the laws and constructs the moats and walls
Because to give someone access to your soul requires total vulnerability.
I am nowhere near that brave.